Aliens want to communicate and they decide to use you and your personality as the base model for all humans. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?
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Well, there’ll be a lot less billionaires pretty quickly, from there it’s gonna be a lot of references to star trek, doctor who, dead philosophers and general southernisms.
lol … aliens arrive in 1960s era London police boxes to try to not alarm us as they make first contact
Aliens first message: … I say my good man, it’s quite a coincidence to find you in this part of the galaxy. I feel pecked by a hundred chickens, fuller than a tick on a big dog and fine as frog hair and not half as slick to greet you on this fair morning under god’s blue sky.
… I think I’m in love with you.
Humanity is screwed.
They like being alone, don’t like loud noises, will find a reason to leave a situation with more than 3 people in a small area. They don’t have any sexual desire and will be most happy to go through life without ever having intercourse. Probably going to go extinct without outside intervention thanks to that, better intervene to preserve the species.
They want to hibernate when it’s cold outside. Cold = anything below 70f.
They’re herbivores though so at least they don’t destroy their planet by mass farming the cruelest and most inefficient food source possible. Silver lining?
Excellent source of creating a slave race? … to build that interplanetary space gun to destroy XMH3003 and those stupid Morkahons
They’re just gonna be commenting on Lemmy all day. Threat averted.
Yes. You are everywhere.
Because I’m actually an entire race of aliens desperately trying to make contact with humans.
Yeah that makes sense. Except, there are no humans here. Only nerds.
I’m autistic. So they’d be very confused with most people I think
There’s a lot of autistic people in this thread
There’s a lot of autistic people on lemmy I think
I’m literally autistic and I can barely even talk to people anymore, so I imagine it’ll be a gigantic disaster.
I think it’d go great.
I feel like they’d be horrified, and conquer our planet and force us all into therapy, but think they’d see us as worth helping
“Why do these aliens keep making stupid, unfunny jokes”?
“Hmm, it looks like these humans really like ‘tentacle hentai’… we could use this to our advantage”
I guess we’re good. :)
Well… it could be worse… you should all thank them they didn’t pick my sister.
Let’s just say the overpopulation issue will be thoroughly resolved
Mein Führer?
Nah, just your average misanthrope
Das ist gut … I think
nah they’d take one look inside that guy’s mind and go “well fuck this species”
Not bad. Couple of you fucks would be ackacked into non-existence but 99.997% of you would be alright.
I think u re asking on the wrong platform.
Screwed!
But this is not a very good/logical/reasonable alien to be in contact with. There are so many …ists with can call this alien. Generalization with sample of one? Pfff… They won’t even get here…
UN: “Boy, they really like using Star Trek memes to convey their thoughts…”
All the Me clones: Sokath, his eyes opened.
Riker: 🍆 💦
Turns out Star Trek was just a retelling of actual intergalactic life
Aliens: Who the hell told them all this stuff … I don’t look like that? … My ass isn’t that fat … Is it?
“These beings have documented a perfect understanding of warp core, matter transmission, and matter replication technologies, yet they refuse to actually use any them and are stuck on a single planet fighting wars over limited resources.”
