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cm0002@mander.xyz to Memes@sopuli.xyz · 2 个月前

Apple that makes eunuchs

lemmy.ml

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Apple that makes eunuchs

lemmy.ml

cm0002@mander.xyz to Memes@sopuli.xyz · 2 个月前
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63
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  • cross-posted to:
  • [email protected]
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  • AeronMelon@lemmy.world
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    2 个月前

    [several transfems are typing…]

    • kittenzrulz123@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 个月前

      Mm…mmmrrroow 🥺

  • Seth Taylor@lemmy.world
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    2 个月前

    Trans lifehack

    • CheerfulPassionFruit@lemmy.world
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      2 个月前

      Was about to ask where to find some, asking for a friend of course

      • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca
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        2 个月前

        But it would make you a nullo?

  • Beth@piefed.social
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    2 个月前

    Can it do tops too?

    • moosetwin@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      2 个月前

      Does it do weddings as well?

  • Courtney (she/her/they) @lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 个月前

    Damn, I just want my balls off. I wanna keep my dick.

    What if I just have a nibble?

    • tetris11@feddit.uk
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      2 个月前

      I remember Snow White a little differently from this

      • ironycanal@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 个月前

        You know all those stories were sanitized.

    • expr@piefed.social
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      2 个月前

      I’ve never heard someone say that before. Why would you want one but not the other, if you don’t mind my asking?

      • Ginny [they/she]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        2 个月前

        Hello! I’m not the person you asked but I figured I’d throw in my experience.

        In my case, if I could snap my fingers and instantly change my penis to a vulva, I would. But I had a haemorroid surgery many years ago, and the month or so afterwards was one of the worst times of my life, so I would prefer it if no surgeon ever went anywhere near my lower trunk ever again.

        But everyone’s experience is different. Some women just like to fuck, and of the trans women who do, some don’t feel the need to replace the factory installed equipment for doing so.

      • Bluewing@lemmy.world
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        2 个月前

        Well, you could still pee standing up.

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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          2 个月前

          my dude, the she-wee has existed since, uh, plastic. maybe only as long as women have served in the military.

          • Bluewing@lemmy.world
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            2 个月前

            Not a very common thing to find in the wild.

            • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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              2 个月前

              i bet if you plucked a pitcher plant it would work

    • yermaw@sh.itjust.works
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      I’m not sure you really want that. As a horny teen I wanked myself dry a few times and it is painful. Imagine it felt like that every time.

      • Courtney (she/her/they) @lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        No, I’m positive I want that.

        I think as a teen we all went a little too hard with our equipment once or twice lmao

      • redjard@reddthat.com
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        2 个月前

        Balls only make sperm, the fluid is the prostate(?) or smthn, it comes from inside the body.

    • grrgyle@slrpnk.net
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      Yeah like is there an artificial flavour I can try? Also someone attached to the birth kit

  • rockSlayer@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 个月前

    Free orchidectomy and penectomy? Where are these apples found? Asking for a friend

    • Tollana1234567@lemmy.today
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      2 个月前

      free castration

  • Annoyed_🦀 @lemmy.zip
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    2 个月前

    Shouldn’t it be called Instant Trans Apple? Non invasive transition, very convenient.

    • sunsofold@lemmy.zip
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      I imagine it’d be more like the kind of removal one gets from other natural causes, like frostbite or a bloodclot. I.e. painful and necrotic

      • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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        2 个月前

        you left out snake and pumabite

  • Jo4ted@lemmy.zip
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    2 个月前

    Any other transfems want to join me in going on an adventure to find these?

  • ironycanal@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    2 个月前

    If, hypothetically, some sort of person who didn’t have a dick and balls were to eat it?

    • qarbone@lemmy.world
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      It’s expunging 15g of crotchmeat no matter what you do or don’t have, so buckle up.

      • Jax@sh.itjust.works
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        So, for reference, studies like the sources for this article suggest the average human penis weighs between 70-100 grams.

        So you’d be growing a micropenis at 15g. Not quite the effusive expulsion you were imagining.

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      2 个月前

      you get all the dicksandballses that have fallen off since the last dickandballsless person to eat one

      • ironycanal@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 个月前

        So this is just a snack for all trans people?

        • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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          2 个月前

          Yeah, like David Bowie

  • bold_omi@lemmy.today
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    2 个月前

    It does not, in fact, do that.

    • KingPorkChop@lemmy.ca
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      “Speak for yourself” he says in a comically high voice.

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    2 个月前

    My sister would love these.

  • altphoto@lemmy.today
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    2 个月前

    If mine fell off, I would make a device to keep it alive so I could play with it when ever I wanted to. Plus now that’s detached you could toss it around, let her borrow it for a few nights or let her use it in the shower. Lots of good things could be coming from this. We just don’t see it because we haven’t been in this position before.

    • karlhungus@lemmy.ca
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      2 个月前

      https://youtu.be/55uaB-0nawo

      • JamesBoeing737MAX@sopuli.xyz
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        2 个月前

        Wow, almost forgot about this one.

      • altphoto@lemmy.today
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        Hilarious!

    • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
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      2 个月前

      it didn’t say they died. it just say they fall off.

    • Gonzako@lemmy.world
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      2 个月前

      WifiDICK

  • RBWells@lemmy.world
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    2 个月前

    Www.applerankings.com

  • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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    2 个月前

    An apple a day keeps the doctor away…because now the doctor is too depressed to go to work and be a doctor…

    • ironycanal@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      No, she’s fine.

  • atomicorange@lemmy.world
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    2 个月前

    No negatives you say?

  • tgirlschierke@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    2 个月前

    where could one acquire such an apple, hypothetically?

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