Most people don’t really know what they want until they’ve had their perspective is broadened.
Filtering people out based on specific physical attributes is wild in my opinion. So glad I found my partner before that became ‘normal’.
That being said I’m speaking for full fledged adults. We have research now that suggests adolesence extends to age 32. I wouldn’t be suprised if people in their 20s were trying to optimize ear or nipple size in their search for a partner, just from my memory of living through that age.
In general I think it’s fine if people know what they want and look for it. The weird/problematic thing IMO is that this became something of a trend (although still exaggerated by social media), where it’s not just a small selection of people with very specific preferences. I agree it’s dumb to restrict yourself like that, especially if you just do it because other people do it and not because it’s actually a core requirement for attraction.
Also adolescence extending to 32 makes about as much sense to me as green extending all the way to blue. We don’t need to call people children to recognize they do be silly sometimes
I think you touched on how social pressure can make it toxic.
By no means advocating for a change in how we define adulthood but a recent paper looking at topographical turning points in the brain identified adolescence as extending from 9 to 32 years of age which explains a lot in my view.
Hell adolescence to 32 is pushing green into purple territory. At a certain point you have to just accept that early adulthood involves a lot of growth, maturing, and continued development.
i’ve looked at dating apps in a few different cities… in some places they’re downright mean about it…
i dated a 5’10 girl before who liked much taller men so she” could wear heels”.
not that she ever did, but she could…
some of them are just mean about their preferences….
i mean, people like what they like, but that 1% who’s mean about it fucks with short guys.
Most people don’t really know what they want until they’ve had their perspective is broadened.
Filtering people out based on specific physical attributes is wild in my opinion. So glad I found my partner before that became ‘normal’.
That being said I’m speaking for full fledged adults. We have research now that suggests adolesence extends to age 32. I wouldn’t be suprised if people in their 20s were trying to optimize ear or nipple size in their search for a partner, just from my memory of living through that age.
In general I think it’s fine if people know what they want and look for it. The weird/problematic thing IMO is that this became something of a trend (although still exaggerated by social media), where it’s not just a small selection of people with very specific preferences. I agree it’s dumb to restrict yourself like that, especially if you just do it because other people do it and not because it’s actually a core requirement for attraction.
Also adolescence extending to 32 makes about as much sense to me as green extending all the way to blue. We don’t need to call people children to recognize they do be silly sometimes
I think you touched on how social pressure can make it toxic.
By no means advocating for a change in how we define adulthood but a recent paper looking at topographical turning points in the brain identified adolescence as extending from 9 to 32 years of age which explains a lot in my view.
Hell adolescence to 32 is pushing green into purple territory. At a certain point you have to just accept that early adulthood involves a lot of growth, maturing, and continued development.
i’ve looked at dating apps in a few different cities… in some places they’re downright mean about it…
i dated a 5’10 girl before who liked much taller men so she” could wear heels”.
not that she ever did, but she could…
some of them are just mean about their preferences….
i mean, people like what they like, but that 1% who’s mean about it fucks with short guys.