• Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
    link
    fedilink
    English
    arrow-up
    88
    arrow-down
    48
    ·
    4 months ago

    I’m very conflicted about this whole thing. On the one hand, yeah it’s kind of a scandal and people have every right to be booing him every time he touches the ball.

    On the other hand, he was convicted, sentenced, did time and is now back in society apparently showing remorse. People are calling for his career to end and various wishes of death on him. Why can’t he continue his life?

    Are we supposed to lock up all criminals forever? Kill them? Just not allow them to follow their chosen career after getting out? Or is it just sports they shouldn’t be allowed to participate in?

    • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      126
      arrow-down
      7
      ·
      4 months ago

      apparently showing remorse

      He showed no remorse. He called it nonsense. He said he made mistakes as a youth. He has not even bothered to offer anything in the way of an apology.

      • Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        14
        arrow-down
        21
        ·
        4 months ago

        I also saw those statements on his wiki. Also saw some about it being “the worst mistake of his life”. I don’t imagine he would get parole without showing remorse.

        • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          43
          arrow-down
          11
          ·
          4 months ago

          You don’t imagine? Well then that proves it. He’s very sorry he raped a 12-year-old girl over and over even though he’s never said so in public.

            • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              51
              arrow-down
              7
              ·
              4 months ago

              The “conservative mindset” that someone who raped a 12-year-old over and over should, at the very least, make a public apology before being allowed to join their Olympic team?

              You’re right, that’s a total MAGA position. Trump 2024!

                • Flying Squid@lemmy.worldM
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  32
                  arrow-down
                  5
                  ·
                  4 months ago

                  Absolutely. We all know what big fans of public apologies MAGA people are.

                  And, of course, suggesting someone who raped a 12-year-old girl multiple times should make a public apology before being allowed on an Olympic volleyball team definitely means I don’t believe in governments.

                  It’s amazing how you’ve gotten me totally right so far.

    • TheMetaleek@sh.itjust.works
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      79
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      He did barely a year of prison… I personally don’t quite think it’s enough for raping a kid, but hey that’s just my opinion

      • Showroom7561@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        16
        ·
        4 months ago

        It seems like a lot of criminals who “did their time” really didn’t do much at all.

        Compare that to a lifetime of hurt caused to the victim(s) and their families, and it just doesn’t seem good enough.

      • Johandea@feddit.nu
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        27
        arrow-down
        15
        ·
        4 months ago

        Enough for what? Your sense of vengeance? I don’t know, only you can tell… Enough for rehabilitation? I don’t know, but it is possible. Time needed for rehabilitation varies widely. It’s quite possible the year was enough. One thing we do know is that the Netherlands is heavily in favour of rehabilitation over punishment, since rehabilitation actually forwards society

        • TheMetaleek@sh.itjust.works
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          34
          ·
          4 months ago

          I am European and heavily against punitive justice. But I think one year of prison for a crime almost universally considered among the worst is not enough for rehabilitation, and I find this opinion validated by the lack of understanding or even remorse shown by the guy in public statements

        • Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          16
          arrow-down
          12
          ·
          4 months ago

          This is exactly the point I’m trying to make, but am getting downvoted because I apparently sound like a “child rape apologist”.

          I understand the crime is emotionally charged, but that doesn’t mean anyone convicted of it should just be thrown in the oubliette.

          • Reyali@lemm.ee
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            5
            ·
            4 months ago

            I believe people can change and I think it’s important we hold space for people to do so. However, that hinges on the person actually growing, which often starts with showing remorse. I know you implied that this guy has done so, but I haven’t seen any evidence of that.

            Even the quote you posted somewhere else about it being the worst thing he’d done, or something like that? That very much sounds like a, “I’m not sorry I did it, I’m sorry I got caught” kind of statement.

            Asked if van de Velde had ever expressed any remorse to him for rape, Immers [his teammate] said: “No, he doesn’t, he doesn’t explain it.” (source)

            “I have been branded as a sex monster, as a pedophile,” he said. "That I am not — really not.” (source)

            If there’s an apology or some actual statement showing his remorse, I’d love to see it, but I’m skeptical that it exists. This whole controversy he’s had a huge opportunity to step up, apologize, and rebuke his prior actions. Instead, he’s faced it all with silence and a reaction of ‘I don’t want to talk about it.’ That is not the behavior of a person who acknowledges they were in the wrong, imo.

            • yamanii@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              4 months ago

              Seems like this whole debacle is because he didn’t make a press tour saying to the whole wide world how remorseful he is, but the comittee said that experts determined that he was remorseful though, so we shouldn’t trust the experts now?

              Van de Velde has fully engaged with all requirements and has met all the stringent risk assessment thresholds, checks and due diligence. Experts have stated that there is no risk of recidivism.

              Van de Velde has consistently remained transparent about the case which he refers to as the most significant misstep of his life. He deeply regrets the consequences of his actions for those involved. He has been open about the personal transformation he has undergone as a result. Since his return he has participated in major international events without incident.

              from https://nocnsf.nl/en/nocstarnsf-takes-measures-to-ensure-a-safe-sporting-environment-for-all-olympic-participants

          • Breezy@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            1
            arrow-down
            7
            ·
            4 months ago

            that doesn’t mean anyone convicted of it should just be thrown in the oubliette.

            Yes it does. I think having empathy is a good thing and most people deserve it. Not child rapists.

                  • Breezy@lemmy.world
                    link
                    fedilink
                    English
                    arrow-up
                    1
                    arrow-down
                    2
                    ·
                    4 months ago

                    No im pretty sure all child rapists are pedophiles. I do not think the 2 ideas should be separated. You make it sound like you are cool with people being pedophiles as long as they’re not a child rapist. Fucking weird.

            • Breezy@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              1
              arrow-down
              6
              ·
              4 months ago

              Wow im being down voted for being a anti-pedo. Yall are fucking weird. And sick 🤮.

              • Soulg@sh.itjust.works
                link
                fedilink
                English
                arrow-up
                8
                arrow-down
                1
                ·
                4 months ago

                No you’re being downvoted for being in favor of barbaric punishments instead of rehabilitation.

                • Breezy@lemmy.world
                  link
                  fedilink
                  English
                  arrow-up
                  1
                  arrow-down
                  2
                  ·
                  edit-2
                  4 months ago

                  Having a less cruel mindset is what allows it to go on though. Our justice system is built by predators for predators so victims are already at a disadvantage, and the fact that anyone would want consideration for the rapist only encourages others. The whole idea of being at all lenient on child rapists is crazy to me

          • friendlymessage@feddit.org
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            9
            ·
            edit-2
            4 months ago

            Your pretentious pseudo-enlightened bullshit pisses me of. No, not everyone here is out for vengeance. But there’s a middle ground between capital punishment and letting a child rapist go after only 13 months without them expressing remorse plus letting them represent their country at the Olympics. Travelling to another country to convince a 12 year old to have unprotected sex three times in two days, leading them to self-harm including an overdose is not “fornication”, it’s rape. This is not rehabilitation but a blatant failure of the Dutch justice system and society.

      • Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        17
        arrow-down
        6
        ·
        4 months ago

        I agree, it seems like a small amount on the face of it.

        But at the same time, I’m more inclined to trust the judgement of the prison system (at least in The Netherlands) as to whether he is ready to return to society.

        • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          4
          arrow-down
          2
          ·
          4 months ago

          It’s not the prison system of the Netherlands that you should be considering, It’s the legitimacy of the politicians that decided to release him. Clearly it was a political move do you believe that somebody else in his position would have been released so early?

          • Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            19
            arrow-down
            3
            ·
            4 months ago

            Nice slogan, but back in reality, there’s a phenomenon documented in psychology literature called Projection. It’s usually those who rabidly accuse others and calling for harsh punishments that are guilty of those same behaviours they are condemning.

          • FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            16
            ·
            4 months ago

            It is possible and encouraged to try and have empathy for even the worst of people.

            Am I an islamic terrorist because I think the CIA shouldn’t torture the 9/11 planners for two decades?

            • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
              link
              fedilink
              English
              arrow-up
              2
              arrow-down
              1
              ·
              4 months ago

              Torture isn’t imprisonment though. One of them is an established method of punishment for actual criminals and the other one is just pointless.

              Also the US has the death penalty so you know I suppose it’s proportionate by their standards.

      • FundMECFSResearch@lemmy.blahaj.zone
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        12
        arrow-down
        6
        ·
        edit-2
        4 months ago

        While I agree this seems extremely small. The netherlands is not the US. The specifics of court cases are not made public. We have no idea about them. It might be a very ambiguous case that barely fit the definition of rape or whatever.

        Not trying to defend rape or rapists, but we may need more context before we can judge the length of a sentence.

        Edit: I just read a less opinionated in depth article on him, and from the details I see, man he fucked up bad, in my opinion he deserved more than 13 months. He got sentenced to 4 years at first but that got cut short.

    • Goodmorningsunshine@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      35
      arrow-down
      2
      ·
      4 months ago

      It’s a good thing the court of public opinion still has a voice and doesn’t approve of child rapists quite so heartily as the Dutch government. What “time” did he do - like 11months? And he was never remorseful in the slightest. If his only real punishment is going to be him and his country getting booed by the world at the Olympics, I’m happy there’s at least that.

    • tobogganablaze@lemmus.org
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      35
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      edit-2
      4 months ago

      did time and is now back in society apparently showing remorse.

      Nope, neither of those.

      • Guntrigger@sopuli.xyz
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        18
        arrow-down
        12
        ·
        4 months ago

        What do you mean? He served 13 months and got out on parole. He’s publicly expressed remorse, but that isn’t exactly conclusive. I assume there would have been some genuine remorse inside, otherwise there would be no parole.

        My point is, if you stop anyone who has been to jail returning to normal society at all, then why let them out at all? You might as well just put every criminal in jail for life, or just kill them straight away.

          • rekorse@lemmy.world
            link
            fedilink
            English
            arrow-up
            7
            ·
            4 months ago

            Did you consider that the Netherlands thinks its important to stand by its rule of reform over punishment? You are being incredibly vague as well with what the person deserves.

            Say it plainly, what should have been done instead?

        • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          1
          arrow-down
          1
          ·
          4 months ago

          You might as well just put every criminal in jail for life, or just kill them straight away.

          Just the child rapists is fine with me. There’s no reforming that.

      • Gestrid@lemmy.ca
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        1
        arrow-down
        9
        ·
        4 months ago

        “I can’t reverse it, so I have to carry the consequences. It’s the biggest mistake of my life.”

        Source: The article linked in the OP

        If that’s not remorse, I don’t know what is.

        • Reyali@lemm.ee
          link
          fedilink
          English
          arrow-up
          6
          ·
          4 months ago

          Remorse: “I am sorry for what I did and the impact it had on the victim. I made stupid choices that hurt another person, and while I can never take that back, I will seek to do better so no one needs to suffer from my actions again.”

          Not sorry you did it, just sorry you got caught: “I can’t reverse it, so I have to carry the consequences. It’s the biggest mistake of my life.”

    • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      22
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      On the other hand, he was convicted, sentenced, did time and is now back in society apparently showing remorse.

      He hardly did any time at all. Frankly you do more time for a parking ticket. Also when did he show remorse like whenever has he ever shown any remorse at all?

    • 100@fedia.io
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      20
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      he can continue his life, but get the fuck out of public positions like this if youre a fucking pedo rapist

    • Tja@programming.dev
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      19
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      How about “not put them representing your country, where other people might understand that as an endorsement as see him as a role model”.

      There is shades of grey between “killing him” and “send him to the Olympics”.

    • ByteOnBikes@slrpnk.net
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      9
      ·
      4 months ago

      On the other hand, he was convicted, sentenced, did time and is now back in society apparently showing remorse.

      He flew to England, raped a 12 yo, got convicted by the English for 4 years. He was deported back to Netherlands, they dropped it to 1 year.

      This isn’t justice.

    • Nuke_the_whales@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      12
      arrow-down
      3
      ·
      4 months ago

      I’m not conflicted. I’m not saying he should be in jail forever. But I’m also saying it’s clear that he shouldn’t be representing his country on the world stage. That’s a privilege you should lose forever when you rape a child. Cause remember, going to the Olympics is a privilege, not a right. It’s like yeah he served your time, would you let him babysit your daughter now then? Or let him hang out at schools? You gotta forgive, but you’re stupid if you forget

      • e$tGyr#J2pqM8v@feddit.nl
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        3
        ·
        4 months ago

        There’s a system in place for that. It’s called ‘verklaring omtrent gedrag’. For many jobs and positions you need this certificate of conduct in order to apply. The ministry of justice will not hand out the certificate if your crime is related to the position you apply for. This means he would probably never be allowed to work at a school for instance.

    • fine_sandy_bottom@discuss.tchncs.de
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      13
      arrow-down
      5
      ·
      4 months ago

      I agree with you pretty much on all points.

      I am also conflicted.

      It’s up to courts and parole boards to determine what punishments are appropriate, given the context of the crimes.

      I don’t like the guy, and of course his crime was repugnant, but I can still acknowledge that he’s one of the best volleyball players in the world. These two opinions are incongruous and yet, they exist at the same time.

      • hydrospanner@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        11
        ·
        4 months ago

        My thought is more along the lines of, “Regardless of his talent level, is this really the kind of person that his country wants representing them on the world stage?”

        Like, okay even if he’s the absolute best by an order of magnitude…if he were from my country, I’d rather lose every match than win on the talents of someone like that.

      • friendlymessage@feddit.org
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        9
        ·
        edit-2
        4 months ago

        For me, there’s a difference between rehabilitation and letting someone represent your country at the olympics. Athletes don’t have to be perfect but to a certain extent they are ambassadors of their country and role models.

        This paired with him not staying in prison for long because the Dutch legal system is fucking abysmal is reason enough for me to celebrate that he’s out.

    • cordlesslamp@lemmy.today
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      11
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      First of all, not all crimes are the same nor should be treated equally.

      Secondly, he raped a 12 year old, and that’s unredeemable in a lot of people’s book.

      • Soulg@sh.itjust.works
        link
        fedilink
        English
        arrow-up
        5
        arrow-down
        2
        ·
        4 months ago

        That doesn’t answer their question though. Those people don’t have to be friends with the guy, but wishing him death or homelessness etc is not only horrible but solves nothing other than making them feel like they’re “better”.

    • Skanky@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      3
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      4 months ago

      It’s simple really.

      His judgement, sentencing and punishment satisfy the needs of the law. the law has done it’s part (arguably terribly in this case) and is at rest.

      This is vastly different than the judgement bright forth by the court of public opinion. They are not so forgiving.

      Perhaps that’s something the dude should have thought about before doing what he did

    • lightnsfw@reddthat.com
      link
      fedilink
      English
      arrow-up
      1
      arrow-down
      4
      ·
      4 months ago

      Why can’t he continue his life?

      Because he raped a child. The only olympic event he should have been allowed to participate in was competitive shooting, as a target.