• SabinStargem@lemmy.today
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    3 hours ago

    If I thought that I was ever going to have sex with someone, I would get myself fixed. Fortunately, I won’t ever have to spend money on that.

  • Tattorack@lemmy.world
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    6 hours ago

    The amount of guys I’ve met in my whole life who outright refused to wear a condom was… One. Singular.

    Called him an idiot. Then he ended up catching an STD. His dick burned for two weeks and I couldn’t stop smiling.

    Anyway, this seems to be another one of those comics that tries present abnormal behaviour as a common thing.

    • colourlessidea@sopuli.xyz
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      5 hours ago

      Depends on where you live/your cultural context. The number of times I’ve heard from women in recent years that men refuse to wear condoms has been truly surprising.

      • imetators@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        2 hours ago

        Surprises me cause I bet decent men won’t have problems with a condom while most substandard men would. No one talks about decent men as much as ones that are bad. Also, if you hear many speak about these men, maybe their preference in men is flawed?

  • Allero@lemmy.today
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    8 hours ago

    If your oral contraceptives cause you any significant side effects, it makes sense to consult a gynecologist to change the prescription. There are many options out there, and correctly chosen ones should not typically cause them.

    In terms of pregnancies, oral contraceptives can be both more or less efficient that condoms depending on the mode of usage for each (and also discipline, don’t skip either). Besides, for many couples accidental pregnancy is a bit of a change of plans, but not something that will warrant abortion or make children unwanted. Again, case-dependent.

    It’s okay to choose condoms as well, as long as partners are happy about it. If that gives you a peace of mind, you can even combine both measures at the same time! It’s only important to remember that there are two (or more) partners involved, and all being happy about the choices made is crucial for great intimacy. Do not ever force someone to take pills if they don’t want to, and discuss your options if someone has issues with condoms. Maybe the issues are with latex condoms specifically, with polyurethane options providing less allergenicity and better sensitivity. Maybe a diaphragm can be your option. Or maybe something else. You can always discuss, you’re not on a gender war or something, you’re partners.

    Personally, I can’t wait for male contraceptive pills to hit the market. Not only it will provide a solution to this specific problem, shifting responsibility for proper selection of contraception and any issues coming with it onto the people who need it the most, it will also provide men with more agency about their reproduction. Finally, you can combine male and female contraceptives to get unparalleled non-barrier protection with good insurance in case one partner misses the pill. Win all-round.

    • Allero@lemmy.today
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      7 hours ago

      On a personal note, sexual discomfort is obviously an important factor to account for when talking about intimacy and love, so it shouldn’t be seen as stupid and unimportant, as portrayed here.

      That should not overpower any health concerns, not least because they are too sources of discomfort, but it should be taken into account.

      Talk it through with your partner - you’re in it together, and there’s almost certainly an option for both of you. Feel free to explore something other than pills and condoms as well if you need it - the world of contraception methods is huge.

      • Allero@lemmy.today
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        20 minutes ago

        I’m so very tired of these pointless gender wars, honestly.

        There are better and more productive ways to voice general concerns - there truly exists a pressure on some women to use hormonal contraception, and this is bad - it’s not okay to pressure your partner in matters of health and intimacy. But what helps is getting to the root of the problem.

        The root is sexual discomfort on one side and anxiety on the other standing in the way of intimacy. So, maybe there are other unexplored options to resolve this conflict in a way that is comfortable to all sides? The world of contraception is very rich, and tries to cater to everyone’s use cases.

  • Solumbran@lemmy.world
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    10 hours ago

    And let’s not talk about contraceptive pills for men, that have been heavily fought against because one of the listed side effects are impotency.

    Instead, let’s push hormones on a sex that relies on them heavily to function properly, and hope that nothing will break.

    • mirshafie@europe.pub
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      8 hours ago

      Oh please. Female contraceptives have been available for 80 years. The first ones were extracted and slightly modified from yams.

      We’re now in a time where pharmaceutical development is in a space age compared to what it was 80 years ago. We’ve mapped the entire human genome, we can bioengineer bacteria to spit out custom molecules and proteins, we have freely available XRC 3d models of hundreds of thousands of proteins and their docking sites, we have (free) computational chemistry software that can do quantum molecular dynamics and supercomputers (but you only really need a fucking laptop), and the toolbox of organic chemistry is vastly larger than what it was in the 1950s.

      The reason why no-one has come up with a safe and effective male contraceptive that can be anywhere near compared to existing female contraceptives is because it turns out to be fucking difficult.

      • Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip
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        2 hours ago

        Scientists have only just started to use actual women to test treatment on, instead of dismissing them as more complicated males.

        Like a month ago they just debuted the first woman sized crash test dummy. Turns out, there were some issues they’d been ignoring.

        • I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world
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          2 hours ago

          So, until recently, do you honestly believe that they just didn’t test female contraceptives? Or do you think they tested them on males instead? Or maybe that argument is a little bit nonsense in this case because while women as a whole are underrepresented in medical testing, the idea that they never, ever, tested on women (especially in the case of drugs exclusively made for women) is a little bit of a ridiculous concept.

        • mirshafie@europe.pub
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          2 hours ago

          Don’t try to pretend that treatments specifically for women are not tested on females.

  • Delphia@lemmy.world
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    15 hours ago

    Am I the only person who is more deathly afraid of a life long STD that could fucking kill me than an unplanned pregnancy?

    I dont care which one of us got the snip, unless I’m sure I’m the only dude you’re banging I’m bagging the fuck up until I see some test results which I’ll be happy to get and provide in kind.

    • Leather@lemmy.world
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      7 hours ago

      I really can’t think of an STI that would kill you these days. Am I missing one?

      Yay condoms!

      • Delphia@lemmy.world
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        7 hours ago

        In a first world country with access to excellent medical care, no underlying conditions in an otherwise healthy person you’re probably going to be fine.

        Thats not to say it might not be a significant contributor to what does get you.

        • Leather@lemmy.world
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          7 hours ago

          What might be a significant contributor to what gets you? Like what STI(s) are you thinking about?

          • mirshafie@europe.pub
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            5 hours ago

            I mean anything from HPV to HIV can still kill you directly even with access to the best health care on the planet.

    • MachineFab812@discuss.tchncs.de
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      8 hours ago

      Honestly why I downvoted OP. They shouldn’t be at the point of having this pissing-match without having used condoms together already, and cumming-inside the vagina isn’t exactly required for intimacy even then.

      OPs characters lack imagination, and are catering to an audience that shouldn’t be encouraged into maintaining such a narrow way of thought.

    • TheFogan@programming.dev
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      12 hours ago

      I’d assume because many people in these discussions are married… in which case yeah getting an STD would be the booger on top of the shit sundae. But yeah the test results only have to be checked overall at the start of the long term relationship… at least assuming you can trust your partner… while pregnancy is something you’ve got to be alert to in the entirety of a relationship.

      • Delphia@lemmy.world
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        11 hours ago

        If your married and kids are a forever no then dude should get the snip. Simple. I’m getting one soonish and if I ever find myself single again I’ll still be wearing rubbers unless Ive had the chat.

  • chunes@lemmy.world
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    13 hours ago

    If your birth control really does even some of those things then you should stop using it and seek one of the many alternatives available to you

  • Synapse@lemmy.world
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    19 hours ago

    Guys saying condoms are uncomfortable don’t know how to properly put them on, and/or use the incorrect size for their dick.

    I’ve tried several brands and sizes and the right condom makes a big difference.

    • Valmond@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      3 hours ago

      It’s not always simple, if Durex XXL and Magnum XL sit tight, check out the Condomeria in Amsterdam, they have a “numbers” line, like 64 for example and they ship worldwide!

      Life saver.

    • Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip
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      2 hours ago

      False. The US regulations (which only recently were loosened in the last couple of years) made sizing half irrelevant. Even if the main portion was sized correctly, due to the regulatory agency not wanting to buy different sized testing machines/attachments, the ring at the base was the same size for every condom.

      This cuts off circulation to like half of men. Like, to numbing levels.

      • Synapse@lemmy.world
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        1 hour ago

        You could try to import condoms from countries with health and safety regulations that make sense then.

    • fonix232@fedia.io
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      19 hours ago

      This was me for a good three years. Standard condoms were always uncomfortable, to the point of pain, but not once did I consider going larger, thanks to my first girlfriend (our breakup was… less than ideal thanks to her cheating, and she then went on to tell me, and most of our friends, that my size was entirely inadequate, borderline micropenis, which I took to heart for quite a while).

      It took the aforementioned three years and quite a few one-night stands telling me I’m big to even start thinking “hey maybe I need larger condoms”.

      Guys, don’t be like me, if it’s uncomfortable, go check out the many brands that do specifically sized nominal widths for condoms. Each will have a guide on successfully measuring yourself, or offer a sample kit which you can try for the right fit. Don’t ruin your sex life with shitty condom choices.

    • Naho_Zako@piefed.zip
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      7 hours ago

      Nah, the artist is Lainey.molnar on instagram who hss been posting since 2020, at least according to this proxy website. Her artsyle pretty much always looked like this, and AI art definitely wasn’t that good back in 2020.

      Funnily enough, her stuff is supposed to be abpit women empowerment and overall left-leaning stuff, but I always got a weird feeling from her posts and art. Lo and behold there’s a long ass reddit post about her craziness (natural treatments for mental illness, alcoholism, potentially faking queer identity, etc.) Also, I guess she might be an original art stealer, aka a tracer lol. At least tracing still requires some effort.

      NOTE: Just because this artist is a bad person doesn’t mean people can be bigots. Don’t reply to this with some “huh looks like the SJW feminist was actually bad, women ☕️” shit. I will block you.

      EDIT: Read the reddit post again and apparently she’s been known to recreate her image by creating and destroying blogs over and over. Idk when she started drawing, but she used to have a myspace blog, so once again, not AI. Just human slop.

      • Soulg@ani.social
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        9 hours ago

        Even this specific post like, yes I know that there are men who try to somehow weasel their way out of condoms using that logic and those guys are bad and wrong.

        But on it’s face both of these things are valid. Birth control frequently sucks a LOT for women, and condoms can be unpleasant (not to the same extreme don’t even try it) for guys. It’s not a competition, nor is it mutually exclusive.

    • chicken@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      14 hours ago

      If it is, at least they bothered to put a different font on the text than the usual for ChatGPT comics. The woman being drawn identically in the second panel except for the eyes is also a point against it being AI.

      • PabloSexcrowbar@piefed.social
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        19 hours ago

        Mass-market condoms often don’t fit properly, even for men who aren’t excessively well endowed. Yeah, you can stretch them over your head and fill them up like a balloon, but that’s not at all comfortable. Also, they do break, so it’s not like there’s no risk of pregnancy.

        • LordFireCrotch@lemmy.today
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          16 hours ago

          Yeah, you have to go for the boutique condoms. Head down to your local condomer. Get measured and fitted for a personal touch

          • PabloSexcrowbar@piefed.social
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            15 hours ago

            There’s actually a couple that I tried that did work significantly better than off-the-shelf, but they still kinda sucked. As I recall, they were really expensive, too.

            This is my penance for being born with a weird dick, I guess.

        • the_q@lemmy.zip
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          19 hours ago

          So you just reiterated the comic. No amount of discomfort compares to what women go through.

          • Fushuan [he/him]@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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            2 hours ago

            The point is that if the act itself isn’t enjoyable for the man to the point they prefer to masturbate, finding a solution for that too sounds like an interesting endeavour. Notice how I said “too”, not “instead”.

            Vasectomy is an option, ofc, and there was some research being done about the male pill like 10 years ago, idk how it’s going. I’m not saying that since the man doesn’t like condoms the woman has to shoulder it, I’m saying that condom discomfort is a valid issue that warrants searching for alternative solutions.

            That’s why I agree with the other person that said that the comic is reductive.

          • [deleted]@piefed.world
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            17 hours ago

            Some women also hate the feeling/lack of direct contact from condoms, it isn’t just a man thing. They are necessary in many sexual relationships, but this comic is the absolute most basic take on birth control options which is broadly accurate but has zero nuance.

            Most women I had sex with were on birth control for reasons other than avoiding pregnancy. I still used condoms except in committed and monogamous relationships, but everyone involved preferred going without if other considerations were taken.

            • the_q@lemmy.zip
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              16 hours ago

              Well that does it, folks. This guy just ended all the arguments because his experience was X and all the women who have openly complained about the drawbacks of birth control were just wrong! I mean, there’s no reason that the artist of this comic should have made this comic. It’s such a niche idea!! Crazy!

          • Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip
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            2 hours ago

            If it makes your dick go dumb because the country you live in has stupid sizing regulations, then yeah it does.

          • JoeBigelow@lemmy.ca
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            13 hours ago

            Does for me, every brand we’ve tried. But birth control fucks her up, so I just deal with it. Without definitely feels better, I don’t think anyone can argue with that.

            • PabloSexcrowbar@piefed.social
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              12 hours ago

              I don’t think anyone can argue with that.

              People who have never had sex like the person you’re replying to would probably still try though.

            • buddascrayon@lemmy.world
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              11 hours ago

              Without does feel better, but a condom doesn’t “take the sensations of pleasure out of sex” as the person I replied to said.

              • Bronzebeard@lemmy.zip
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                2 hours ago

                If the ring at the bottom which is regulated to one specific size in your country, cutting off the circulation to half the men living there, then yeah, it literally does.

          • Lumisal@lemmy.world
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            17 hours ago

            Why do some women choose birth control despite the potential side effects if not needed for medical purposes, sir White Knight?

            • the_q@lemmy.zip
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              17 hours ago

              Some do. But this comic is comparing multiple bad side effects to lack of pleasure.

                • the_q@lemmy.zip
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                  16 hours ago

                  Because some women aren’t all women? Let’s not even get into the argument of the expectation of sex and fear of rejection that women feel in speaking their minds. Pretending to feel a certain way to keep their partner because that’s how it’s been for forever can lead to women saying they like something they do not. It’s not that hard, but then again there is a male loneliness epidemic for a reason.