I don’t have a problem with any of what you said just now. Keep using it as a filter if it works for you.
I have a big problem with the insinuation that anyone that walks away is saying more about themselves than they are the person they’re talking to. It’s a two-way street. You’re passing judgement by essentially saying anyone who does not talk for any reason is indecent.
That’s what you were saying in your initial comment. And it’s clear you aren’t able to think that other people may have their own issues such as the purported anxiety, from another comment. That, to me, denotes a lack of empathy, putting yourself in their shoes.
Maybe they’ve had trauma before, from being approached on the street. Maybe they panic. Maybe they are having a bad day.
That none of these crossed your mind is what makes me angry about your stance of characterising everyone who chooses to talk as “decent”. You’re not even sure they are! It could be they want something from you, or they feel obligated, or they’re lying or feigning interest.
But because they fell into your preferred pattern of communication you judge them as “decent”.
If you can’t see how judging everyone around you for their own behaviour which does not affect you can come across as massively arrogant and full of yourself, then that just denotes even further arrogance.
Thanks for the insight … I’ve made a subtle change to my first comment to reflect what you said.
It was a poor choice of words and phrasing on my part … a lot of time I’m just off handedly commenting on things while doing something else and never think too much or too clearly about what I’m saying or commenting.
As an older man now … I do take time to gauge who I am talking to, especially young people, because I know social anxiety, being awkward and just being young makes it difficult for young people to do any kind of small talk. But I also do have to do it safely in a public setting where I can feel safe and the person I talk to can feel safe.
As you can see … small talk even in a public forum like this is a skill we have to learn.
If anything small talk is necessary because it teaches all how to live with one another.
I don’t have a problem with any of what you said just now. Keep using it as a filter if it works for you.
I have a big problem with the insinuation that anyone that walks away is saying more about themselves than they are the person they’re talking to. It’s a two-way street. You’re passing judgement by essentially saying anyone who does not talk for any reason is indecent.
That’s what you were saying in your initial comment. And it’s clear you aren’t able to think that other people may have their own issues such as the purported anxiety, from another comment. That, to me, denotes a lack of empathy, putting yourself in their shoes.
Maybe they’ve had trauma before, from being approached on the street. Maybe they panic. Maybe they are having a bad day.
That none of these crossed your mind is what makes me angry about your stance of characterising everyone who chooses to talk as “decent”. You’re not even sure they are! It could be they want something from you, or they feel obligated, or they’re lying or feigning interest.
But because they fell into your preferred pattern of communication you judge them as “decent”.
If you can’t see how judging everyone around you for their own behaviour which does not affect you can come across as massively arrogant and full of yourself, then that just denotes even further arrogance.
Thanks for the insight … I’ve made a subtle change to my first comment to reflect what you said.
It was a poor choice of words and phrasing on my part … a lot of time I’m just off handedly commenting on things while doing something else and never think too much or too clearly about what I’m saying or commenting.
As an older man now … I do take time to gauge who I am talking to, especially young people, because I know social anxiety, being awkward and just being young makes it difficult for young people to do any kind of small talk. But I also do have to do it safely in a public setting where I can feel safe and the person I talk to can feel safe.
As you can see … small talk even in a public forum like this is a skill we have to learn.
If anything small talk is necessary because it teaches all how to live with one another.