Self proclaimed billionaire can’t afford a podium that doesn’t wobble during deranged rant

Detroit has entered the chat.

Knockin’ me out with those American thighs

YES!

It’s a quirky pretentious thing that they take pride in. It’s not Ohio State University. It’s THE Ohio State University

Fair point. I wonder what the weather is like up there on those high horses

If you’re from the Midwest and don’t call it THE Ohio State University you’ve immediately lost my trust. And I didn’t even go there.

Onward to the paper, my noble steed!

Fuckin’ oversensitive dipshits. All of them. They can feel free to paddle their douche canoes as far away from me as possible.

Do we have clearance, Clarence?

I know. Different movie but I couldn’t resist.

Cast CROPDUST and watch in delight as the room evacuates due to the stench emanating from your festering bowels.

This comment hit me like a gut punch of dread.

And now I’ll think about it for years.

This is how The Battle of Wisconsin starts.

Hashtag producestrong

Literally the first rule of Raccoon Club. You don’t talk about Raccoon Club.

If you’ve never rolled over in laughter after someone rips The Big One, I will forever question your friendship.

Farts are tactfully hilarious bodily functions. Mad props, too, if you covertly crop dust an entire room.

Yes. American Pie - Summer Edition. Just as warm, but a little bit wetter.

If that was the intentent, I get it. But if you’re going to flip the bird you should at least send it INTO the camera to enforce the message. This just feels stupid.

Total eclipse of the fart. Time to put your viewing glasses back on.

Why are most of their palms facing outward?

I’ve never seen it done that way. It seems really uncomfortable and a bad way to to transition into a fistfight if shit’s about to go down.