"I’ll put the 2 bricks in the evidence locker "

It is with great regret, i bear the news that this sign has been replaced.

I’ve already warned my family, if nukes start dropping in our area, I’m running towards the blast - I’m not hanging round to rebuild.

What’s “CARiES”?

I still don’t understand how there can be any question, they caught him writing his memoir “How i totally killed that guy and why” by Luigi Mangione (an autographed copy). Open and shut case

Australia has too many electricity distributors shipping profits overseas instead of upgrading the grid

Доброе утро, товарищ

laughs in weekly pay

Do you have something more like a sweater?

He’s about to smuggle food into a cinema

No, obtain a real human skeleton from… a legal skeleton store 🤔

Didn’t you hear, they’ve almost succeeded at nuclear fusion, almost 90 whole seconds of stable fusion, any day now

Is the joke that they really mean the N-word?

Once you all agree on a day, let me know and I’ll take the other one. No queues anywhere!

*current

AI has become the genie granting overly specific wishes.

“You said, with his five fingers clasped in prayer”

I kinda assumed this was part of their plan. Rope along some Republicans who are too moderate(?) for Trump, then ditch at the last minute and tell them they have to vote for Trump now. Gives less chance that they’ll have time to sway to Dems or other 3rd party candidates

Love to see the face of Jan 6 2.0 rioters, when they realized someone in power actually wants to stop them this time