Projecting personal dialogue onto others doesn’t make you a messiah.

If someone doesn’t like what you’re doing to them, and you know it’s making them uncomfortable and you even go as far as to tout it to shame them and give it an excuse “oh they don’t like having their thoughts said out loud”, you are doing what an abuser does. Minimize their victims. You don’t even allow them to defend themselves. This is abusive behaviour.

Asserting that peoples behaviors are intrinsically violent can also be a violent means of communication

Abusers also try to turn tables and call themselves a victim at the moment someone calls out their abusive behavior.