Well the good news is:

1. That literally is not your fault.

2. You can learn to gradually undo some of those tendencies, to some extent.

My lemmy instance has a series of random… header quotes, like flavortext in a game loading screen or something.

One of them, which ironically seems to be an apocryphal, misattirubted quote, but is still a good sentiment nonetheless:

“Before you determine that you suffer from depression or low self-esteem, first, make sure that you are not simply surrounded by assholes.”