That wish was defective, it didn’t remove all the damaging expectations.
Is this supposed to be a neurodivergence meme?
…It kinda is to me.
They told me I was smart because I could speak and write well. But being good at language is not the same as intelligence. I didn’t need compliments, I needed help.
I was always told I was smart growing up. what it did was gave me an excuse to not try.
empty complements fill a bubble of confidence that shields the ego from challenges.
praise kids on the objective goals they achieve instead of telling them “you’re really smart”.
Yes — and the term to read more about here is “growth mindset.”
What’s wrong with being shitty and dumb. You can’t be perfect. Just be as smart and non-shitty as you are. Don’t atress about being 100% at everything. That’s a treadmill you can’t do.
Being dumb is fine. Being shitty isn’t.
Depends on the kind of shitty.
Shitty to other people? Yeah, not acceptable.
Shitty at skill X? That’s ok.
That’s true.
In this case it seems like the context has to be “a shitty person” which I interpret as “shitty to other people and that sort of thing” but overthinking it now
My experience with the feeling of “being shitty” is when I think of all the bad decisions that lead me to being in the dead end, no skill job I have; thinking about the bills I’m behind on, the chores I’m behind on, the friends who keep reaching out that I haven’t responded to, how I’m probably not doing enough for my kid or partner, things like that
But I really try not to go shitty to other people because for the most part, they’re not the cause of my shittiness
“But I really try not to go shitty to other people because for the most part, they’re not the cause of my shittiness”
If more people had this attitude, we’d have a world where people would have more space to address the other kinds of “being shitty” that you describe (and potentially prevent ourselves from developing bad habits that lead to cycles of shittiness).
I’m sorry that we live in a world that makes it really hard to not be shitty, but I’m glad that you try to avoid being shitty to other people. That’s infinitely more important than the other kinds of shittiness, in my view.
I don’t know if shitty people worry about whether they’re shitty people though. To my mind the character being somewhat self aware means they’re probably just self-obcessing rather than robbing people or abusing them.
Low self-esteem rather than low morals.
Good point
But hey! No pressure.
Not having the expectations doesn’t mean you don’t have the ability. Not that that will stop things from being shitty when you grow up, intelligent or not.
Edit: missed the “still” part. Pretty spot on.
